AHH
ok i know it has been FOREVER!!!! But i kept coming and writting blogs and then never getting around to posting them so i am FOR SURE! posting this one lol. WEll alot has changed in the last little bit. Back to school was good and i am coming to exams, getting ready for all that stuff. and then i get a week off..woo hoo! lol So ya im pretty good....got some stuff bothering me...stuff thats been going on for a while. And i dont even know anymore i gotta tell ya.....like ive tried and ive tired hard and im getting nothing. I am sick of working so hard and getting nothing in return. I dont want to say im giving up....but its looking that way. I dont know....i guess things werent exactly how i thought they were...and people werent who i thought they were. Its kind of disapointing.....but i mean i guess its life...i cant make people try. Ahh well.....enough bad stuff. i am doing pretty good really..best i have been lately..i have been soo stressed out recently with school and now its calming down a bit which it always nice lol. But anyways...i am off to eat dinner. sorry this is short. but i dont got much to say
much loveee
-abbey<3

hey all,
well again its been a while hasnt it? well i am sorry. Life over christmas can get crazy...and let me tell you this year i think it set a record. lol I have been out of my mind busy. But i am having a blast! I went bowling last night with my youth group..tons of fun as always....larissa came...man i lvoe that girl. I dont know what it is but she an make me have a great timke no matter what. i had the worst headache and wasnt feeling good at all last night but she somehow made me forget about it..so i could have fun! so i had a blast...with tye too ..haha soo many laughs...tyesha like threw her bowling ball lol ...we did ten pin so we used the uge balls and they were so heavy lol so we could hardly to it..lol and then tye like winds up and throws her ball but in the wrong direction i laughed soo hard. it was great. so last night was tons and tons of fun!! And tomorrow is church..cant wiat for that then off to larissa to spend the night!! AHH i am crazy excited for that one..amn spending new years with larissa....uh its going to amazing! anywas sorry that this isnt that long and that it realyl is boring..but so is my life ..so deal with it lol
all my love
-abbey<3

Hey all!
well i dont got lots of time....but i wanted to write something to get back in the habit of doing this...cause last time it was wayyy too long between each post lol. So as for me life is good..getting really ready for christmas....it really like snuck up on me this year..like tomorrow is christmas eve.! lol thats soo weird....it feels like it should be a month away and its in like two days! crazyness!! lol anyways i am all set though..excited for boxing day shopping AHH!! lol soo excited...looking forward to spending time with my family..laughing..eating! ahh i love christmas food...haha. and cooking! yesss..get to help cook christmas dinner maybe! haha so thats cool. anyways i gotta run..if im not back before christmas! HAVE A GREAT CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!
-abbey

Heyyy all
wow....its been a while eh? well i officially appologize..but life has been....uhh brutal lol. Sooo busy..sooo much homework along with a whole bunch of other crap going on. But i have decided.....after alot alot alot alot of thinking that it is no longer going to bother me. I have tried and tried and tired, and somehow all the work put into all of it..always leaves me empty handed. And i am not saying that i am not going to keep working on it...because if the opportunity comes where i can work on it...i will be the first to fix it up.....but i am not working on it alone...theres just no way i can. All these problems in my life just end up stressing em out..and i dont care anymore....all i got and all i need is God, family...my good friends and the faith that i can get trhough anything...and that nothing is ever as bad as it seems. I mean i have realized that stressing out over all this.......all the problems life has thrown my way...is not what God wants me to do...God wants me to trust in him to get me through....not try to do it all myself. its pointless and gets me no where. So with a renwed, and everlasting faith in Jesus Christ i know, that nothing else can really hurt me.
-abbey<3>

Hey all.

Well this day has been a weird one. It started out pretty crummy....and around lunch got even crummier....and then we had our school buy out..and after i left school...it was really good. I went to my schools football game..we made it to city championships for teh first time in 37 year lol. Wedont suck that bad...haha but ya it was soo cold and rainy and i got totally soaked...and they lost..BUT! the brightside was that i hung out with grace and david the whole time almost and wow...i dont think i have ever laughed so hard....my stomach hurt soo bad after from laughing soo much lol. But it was great. So my day was good...i am doing really good..i am kinda confused about some stuff....and some people in my life...i hate it when you loose things. Like when you are a kid and you put your favourite toy down somewhere and loose it. I remeber when iwas about ...6 i think i was at my grandmas and i had this toy cat thing..that i loved..she was my favourite out of the cats i had (they were these little...toy cat things) so somewhere in my grandparents house i put that cat down...and i lost it. It was my favourite toy..i spent hours playing with this thing....and i couldnt find it anywhere. So i told my grandma and she told me to look everywhere for it...she helped me...we looked everywhere...and finally right when i was about to give up...we found it. It had fallen in between the cabnets in her appartment. BUt i remember how worried i was that i would never find my cat...i thought i had lost it forever...but just when i was about to give up i checked one las tplace and found my cat. So....i guess its not about loosing it.....its about not giving up until you get it back...because in life...stuf gets screwed...life gets bsuy sometimes we loose stuff....but its not the loosing of the stuff that matters...it never giving up...not letting anything get i nthe way of finding it...and keeping it. So if you think you've lost something..whether it be a toy..lol or a friendship..or your boyfriend or girlfriend....or relationship with your family.....whatever it may be...dont dwell on that fact that you lost it...think about how you can get past that and find either new things..or work on rebuilding what you lost. Either way its not about how you lost it...or what you could have done to preven you loosing it that matters...its finding..and fixing..and rebuilding. So dont give up just yet....there's always one more spto to look..to fix...to build up.

-abbey<3

Hey all.

Well...i dont think i could be...well....more content right now. Well maybe if i didnt have a mountain of homework still to do tonight..that would make life a little better...but other than that i am very very happy. My thumbs are up..lol actually i just liked that picture..so i had to include it somehow lol.But anyways..i am happy because....not only is one of my friends getting baptized on sunday!!! yay! so exciting..i am so happy for her....but i have got my life so on track...i have never felt so good. You know.....God really has just really blown my mind. It really became clear to me this weekend. As much as this weekend has its ups and downs i have never felt so blessed. I was sitting in church on sunday...first of all i had soo much fun being back in canada and worshiping god..it was the funnest worhsip i have had in a while. So that was amazing..and then i sat and was listening to this guy speak...we had a guest speaker.....and he was talking about how things in your life can put chains on you....and nothing can undo those chains except the love and peace God puts in your life when you say..you know what...God i need you to come into my heart and guide my life...i need you to forgive all the stuff i have done..and just give me a new start...with you as the guidance in my life. And i mean..i asked God to come and be in my life when i was a kid...i have been a christian my whole life..but thats not to say that i have always stuck to that. I had a point in my life where...i was so far from God that i didnt even want to live.....in my messed up head..i thought you know what..not even God could love me now. And then.....something happened.....that to me at the time felt like the worst thing that could have happened...but looking back now it probably saved my life...i got caught. My parents found out the way i was living.....the things i had done....i had to go to my friends and be like...i totally betrayed you....i had to fix major problems in my life..and i had and am still having to build back major trust...but without that.....i dont know what i would have done. I was telling my friend the other day..we were talking about it...and i told her..that if i hadnt have gotten caught that day.....i dont really know what i might have done to myself. But by the grace of God.......and his love for me dispite all the sin in my life.....he stepped in and saved me. He forgave me and unlocked the chains that sin had put on my life. And i really...just sat down...listening to this guy and i totally felt everything fall away....i had been forgiven for the things i did by others..but i had not forgiven my self up until that point.....and i prayed..and i was like..right there....God...i need you to take this from me...its not something i can fight on my own and you need to take it and help me forgive myself for this....i want to love you full out..forever and ever...no chains..nothing holding me back. It was one of the most freeing sundays ever! lol I just feel so blessed..and thankful that God loved me that much ......and that i can live my life for only one purpose....him.

We sang this song on sunday too..and one line of the song was....

Your grace has found me just as i am...empty handed but alive in your hands. Without GOd..i have seen my life...and its horrible...its nothing...i am empty handed.....but with God and his grace....i am alive. But without him......i dont know where i would be.....it truly amazes me how empty i can feel without him. But i tell you one thing..i've been there...emptier than empty....and i am never going there again.

psalms 107:1<3

-abs

Heyy all.

Well i just wanted to post something..however short it may end up being because i didnt want it to be too long since the last one. Mind you i dont even remember when the last one was so it could be like..yesterday lol. i am a little out of it....really tired and stressed i have sooo much to do. its crazy..like missing two weeks of school...not so much fun. Catching up is brutal. But whatever i am managing..i know God wouldnt give me the chance to go to africa and then let me come home and not be able to manage...i realize he gives me nothing i cant handle..so am much as it seems like i cannot do this lol...i definatley can with his help! So pray for me guys its going to be rough. Anyways other than school..life is pretty good...its just to be home....we are still not totally un-packed either..but getting there. I was thinking today...about helping. You ..people often ask me..why i do so much.....why i cook..why i help at church..why i clean...why i am always busy helping out someone or doing something. And i had a friend ask me the other day..dont you ever just get tired? And the truth is....YES! I do...i get so tired sometimes....sometimes half the stuff i do i dont want to but i know that it has to be done. I think its not a matter of what i am doing anymore..or how i am helping..as long as i am helping in someway than im good....i mean its little compared to what my parents ..and other people in my life do for me.....its almost nothing in comparison to that ...but still....stuff needs to be done sometimes..even if you think you shouldnt have to do it..or its not your job. I find too that when you help others..you really appreciate it when others help you too...it gives you a perspective on stuff..it lets oyu see just how hard the people around you work....and sure..i get tired. All the time....but that will never stop me from doing stuff that has to be done. Think about it...really if everyone just stopped doing there job because they got tired of it..we wouldnt ever get anywhere. It has really helped me to see that even in al lthis stress of homework and work and what not....that i mean....it doesnt matter how much you get done...how much you help...as long as you are working hard at whatever it is your doing...then you're set. And i was think too today about all the stuff i have to do....and how i am am so sure i am going to like fail and i thought of this verse......its a very popular bible verse but it always gets me when i start to think that icant do stuff. It goes like this

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Jer. 29:11

Talking about how god knows all the plans and things he has for you..and no matter what you should always remember that...that he will bring you through whatever you are about to face. That God will bring you through and give you a hope and a future! uh i love how the God always gives me those verses right when i need them. So yes..after stressing all day i sat down and got an email from and at the end of it was this verse. It was just what i needed! So right about now..everything i got to do..really ...just doesnt seem too big...cause i know God is bigger!

lots of love

-abbey<3